"Honey, your husband will have to park it in the parking lot (duh)...and by the way, there are no rooms for you," she informed. This couldn't be happening to us. Not here, not now, not today.
Today was the day I'd thought about my entire life. Anytime I'd stuffed a pillow up my t-shirt playing with my friends or anytime I'd wake from a dream convinced my newborn was in the room with me. But more importantly, this was the day the previous nine months had been preparing me for, and I was not ready.
Dustin left the waiting room as I watched a dad sitting across from me playing with his iPhone as he allowed his toddler to introduce herself to everyone else around her. I wondered if she was going to be a big sister soon and was just practicing her introduction to her new little sibling. Mid smile, I tensed up sensing another wave. Holding onto the armchairs, I tightly shut my eyes and bit down with my teeth. It was so much stronger than all the other ones.
"Where was Dustin? Why does this have to be so uncomfortable? Why don't they have a room for us? Who is Sarah? Oh, yea! That's me!!!" I thought hearing my first of four names being called from the front desk. "It looks like they have the very last room ready for you, ma'am," I was told as a nurse invited me to follow.
I walked in to a very nice, surprising warm, sterile room. A nurse was busily preparing the room for what looked like some serious business. I didn't even think she'd noticed me until she said, in as few words as possible, for me to change into my gown. I wasn't sure if I was supposed to go to the bathroom to be modest knowing that they were soon going to see more of me than I even knew existed.
Not wanting to hurry any premature vulnerability, I decided the bathroom was a better choice. It was just awkward. I put on the two gowns, one frontwards and one backwards, as she'd asked and even neatly folded all my clothes, most of which were pajamas. I worried that Dustin would never find me, but was comforted as I heard his confident voice enter the room starting up a conversation with the nurse.
I walked out and couldn't help but wonder if he thought I was pretty. With a reassuring kiss, he let me know everything was ready. He had set up the speakers, our computer was up and running, and my specific socks I wanted to deliver in were ready to be put on my feet. He informed me he had even grabbed the birth plan. "Oh, yea," I remembered, "the plan."
You see, having read multiple books and articles, having attended birthing and parenting classes, and having innumerable suggestions thrown our way over the past nine months, we had heard all about birth plans. And within the past two weeks, we had finally narrowed ours down to three pages and even had our OB sign it. Yes, we really did. Yes, we were those people. There were specifics, one of which read: Don't even ask if I want pain medicine, because I do not.
After our room nurse, who we learned was named Beth, checked me, with wide eyes she popped up and said, "Darling, you are 7 cm!" Well, being told that I was five earlier that week by my doctor, I hadn't expected anything different. However, after talking with Beth we learned that most women in labor come to the hospital around 2 or 3 cm. along. That explained why the nurse at the front desk looked at me so funny when I walked up smiling asking for a delivery room.
Beth called immediately for the anesthesiologist. She asked me funny questions like, "Are you sure you're okay?" and, "You really aren't acting like you are 7 cm... you must have a high pain tolerance." The truth was, I didn't want to let down my guard. "Now where was that anesthesiologist before I explode!"
He arrived within the hour and prepped my back for the injection. Dustin stood in front of me holding my hands and resting his forehead against mine. I could not have survived that day without my sweet husband and best friend by my side. The anesthesiologist told me I had scoliosis, (which I don't) so as soon as he injected me all I could think of was my years of ballet without a single teacher noticing my crooked back. Suddenly those thoughts were replaced with a warm, relaxing numbness all throughout my trunk and legs. Relief.
Dustin's brother brought lunch and I snuck a fry (I wasn't supposed to eat) as we watched Wall-e. Nurse Beth would come in and out to check on us every once and a while, but now we were just waiting. After not much progress after a few hours she asked if I'd like to start pitocin or have my water broken. Choosing the later, I felt gush of warm water (and other stuff) and knew Julip would come shortly.
Beth woke me up, rushing in and asking if I felt the need to push. She had been monitoring me at the nurses station and had noticed the pressure of the contractions had skyrocketed. "Was my mom here yet?" I thought as Dustin hurried to my bedside. Beth checked down below and I was 100% and fully dialated. Game time.
Beth sat right down on the bed next to my right leg and Dustin stood on my right side holding my hand as she gave instructions on how to push. I asked for a mirror so I could see the progress, if any, as we got into the game. I did what she said and pushed with all my might. My faced turned so red and I was a little embarrassed at how hard I had pushed. "But wait," I thought, "that's not what I think it is...is it?" Beth was impressed with how serious I had taken her instructions. "Okay, I can see her head," she casually said as she looked at Dustin and me. "You can WHAT?" I exclaimed.
With no hesitation, I pushed again, this time even harder to see if she'd progress. If she could really see her head, I knew she'd be out in a matter of minutes. She did come out a little more, but not all the way. I can remember going on like that for a few times, Beth having a conversation about ministry (her husband was a worship pastor) with Dustin as if nothing life changing or monumental was happening. Beth then looked down, told me to stop pushing (the most insane thing anyone can tell a woman giving birth) and called my doctor.
As soon as Dr.Reidy walked in the door, she barely had enough time to suit up (she really only could put a bootie on one shoe). I was pushing Julip out. I could see her head in the mirror, I could feel the pressure, there was no stopping me! And with a gush of energy (and other stuff), she slipped right out!
U2's Miracle Drug was playing, and Dustin and I were in tears. We were so overwhelmed with emotion we just looked at each other and whispered, "I love you," and, "God is so good," back and forth. Dustin cut the cord, and we held out precious baby in our arms as she let out little noises and cute cries. She was perfect.
Our first picture as a family of three.
I cannot describe the love I have for this little human.
I love this picture! Look at that face!
That proud daddy has my heart!
I hope you enjoyed our story. Thanks for reading. It was fun to revisit all the sweet details.
With love,
the Jernigans, all three
2 comments:
if the pioneer woman wrote birth stories... they would be this! love this, caro! so sweet.
Thanks for sharing!
Post a Comment